Your Tax Dollars at Work

Every time I hear someone having a hissy about some assinine law or ordinance up for vote I have to laugh. Lock a bunch of cranky old stuffshirts  in a room together for too long and what do you expect? There is just no telling what they will come up with. I have collected silly laws for years now.  You can Google them as silly laws, dumb laws, etc. When I need a good laugh I read them. Behind every one of these laws there was an incident that outraged someone enough to demand that something be done about it. Trying to picture what happened always gets me going. I like to think of all the wild and crazy adventures I’ve had and will still have and contemplate what kind of law could result from them.  Here are few of my favorites:

Alabama

It’s illegal to shoot yourself to get out of jury duty. I have contemplated that option.

Alaska

It is illegal to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. My question is, how the hell did they get the moose in the plane, and just how drunk were they?

Louisiana

Biting someone with your natural teeth is “simple assault,” while biting someone with your false teeth is “aggravated assault.

California

No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

Connecticut

It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.

It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.

Florida

Men are not allowed to wear a strapless gown in public

Kansas

Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.

It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.

Maine

It illegal to step out of a plane while it is in flight. Well duh!

Missouri

It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).

It’s illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.

New York

The penalty for jumping off a building is death.

New Yorker’s cannot dissolve a marriage for irreconcilable differences, unless they both agree to it.

Oregon

Babies may not be carried on the running boards of a car.

Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing.

Pennsylvania

1. Automobiles travelling on country roads at night must send up a rocket every mile, then wait ten minutes for the road to clear of livestock.”

2. If a driver sees a team of horses, he is to pull to one side of the road and cover his machine with a blanket or dust cover that has been painted to blend into the scenery.

3. In the event that a horse refuses to pass a car on the road, the owner must take his car apart and conceal the parts in the bushes.

Tennessee

It is illegal to shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile. I can hear the banjos playing.

Texas

It is illegal to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. Aww shucks, why not?

It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

Washington

When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.

All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.

Wisconsin,

It is illegal to shoot off a gun while one’s partner is in the middle of an orgasm.  Finally, a law that makes sense!

12 responses

  1. Trinity,

    Found you by clicking the tag Dumb laws. Stopped by because of your name. When I see Trinity River I think of only one place — my home town. Glad I took the time to read your post.

    Dee.

    1. Why thank you, fellow Trinity Riverite 🙂

  2. Trinity you certainly made my day! I’m at work with a fever (therefore very grouchy, as you can imagine) and I couldn’t help laughing out loud the whole way through. The Texas ones cracked me up the most! Thanks for the laughs 🙂

    1. Glad you got some laughs. Hope you feel better soon:)

  3. Brilliant!!! Over here in the UK we have “one or two” rules like that…

    * Londoners are not allowed to keep a pigsty in the front of their homes.

    *A law introduced in 1307 ensures that the head of any dead whale found on the British coast becomes the property of the king and the tail belongs to the queen – should she need the bones for her corset.

    *In the city of York, it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.

    *In London, England, wife beating is legal just as long as it is not after 9pm and it doesn’t disturb the neighbours.

    *In Lancashire, no person is permitted after being asked to stop by a constable on the seashore to incite a dog to bark.

    *In the UK, a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants – even, if she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.

    *In the UK, a man who feels compelled to urinate in public can do so only if he aims for his rear wheel and keeps his right hand on his vehicle.

    *In London, England, it is illegal to impersonate a Chelsea pensioner which once carried the death sentence in the 19th century.

    *Firing a cannon close to a dwelling house carries a £200 fine under the 1839 Metropolitan Police Act.

    * The 1847 Town Police Clauses Act, threatens a £1,000 fine for hanging washing across the street, beating or shaking carpets, rugs or mats (doormats excepted before 8am), singing profane or obscene songs or ballads or using any profane or obscene language, wantonly discharging firearms, making bonfires, flying kites, sliding on ice or snow, extinguishing any lamp, or wilfully and wantonly disturbing residents by ringing their doorbells. (Wonder if I can use this to get rid of the neighbours…hmmmm lol)

    *It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour (shucks and I JUST got my suit polished!)

    *Cab drivers must ask all passengers if they have small pox or the plague and it is illegal for them to carry rabid dogs and corpes, and (until 1976) were required to carry a bale of hay to feed a horse.

    And it isn’t just old laws that are a bit silly, I found this rule from 2006….

    *Under the UK’s Tax Avoidance Schemes Regulations 2006, it is illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know, though you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing.
    (ummmmm o…k….. lol)

    1. LOL. It doesn’t say they can not keep a pigsty inside their home. 🙂 Thanks for the insight into English laws.

      1. this was great! good post to keep adding our info. I’ll have to keep popping in to check.

  4. I hope that gun in Wisconsin isn’t his own, um, personal gun that’s shootin’ off a tad too early!

  5. You certainly gave me a good laugh. I am really partial to that last Wisconsin law. That one is really funny to picture. “Wait a minute honey, stop what your doing, I have to shoot my gone first.”

    I also liked the one about jumping off the building in New York. I guess if the fall didn’t kill you, then they would hang you. Maybe the word illigal was more of a deterent when that particular law was written.

    Gret post and I loved it.

  6. he he. Me too. Good thing I didn’t spot a what I thought was a buffalo out any hotel windows. Although, come to think of it, I don’t usually travel with my shotgun.

  7. I live in Texas, and can unequivocally say I’ve broken one of the two laws listed above. Lock me up!

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: