To Bra or Not to Bra – That is the Question

To Bra or Not to Bra, That is the Question.

Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of mature breasts. Or to take arms against a sea of uncomfortable brassieres, and by opposing end them?

Who invented corsets anyway? Who ever did, if they were still alive, should be shot at dawn after much ceremony. Think about it. One person, or small group of people, is responsible for the suffering of billions of women. People have done 30 days in the hole for a lot less.

The founder of the modern brassiere was Mary Phelps Jacob. She used 2 silk handkerchiefs and a ribbon because she didn’t want to wear a corset to a party. Can you blame her? It was a step in the right direction.

Mary would be rolling over in her grave if she saw the bras of today. She would return to her grave if she had to wear one! Are these hideous contraptions ever tried on a living breathing female before released on the market? I don’t care how much lace and cute little flowers you attach to a barbed wire fence. It’s still barb-wire.

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Got suckered yet again recently and bought a cami-bra. According the sales woman this was part bra part camisole. The greatest invention since sliced bread, intended to cover your naughtiness should you lean forward near a poor unsuspecting male of the species.

And soooo comfortable. All this said with a straight face. This lady missed her calling as a world-class poker player. My newly acquired instrument of torture had daggers concealed in the seams, I swear! I bent forward for something and got jabbed in the armpit so brutally that I gasped from pain. It went in the trash as soon as I got home.

I am convinced that the only reason women are not ruling the world at this very moment is because they are constantly fiddling with their bra. Or out shopping for one that is comfortable. Oh wait, we are running the world. Well, my theories are not always rational.

OK, I know I am decades past the whole “burn your bra” movement, but I was a teeny bopper at that time. Didn’t need to wear one and didn’t, but no one noticed…then.

Going bra-less was fine when my bosoms where positioned correctly. Today is a different story. Despite all the lies told to me, they have headed south, as nature intended. “Oh girl, you should wear a bra at all times or your breasts will be down to your knees when you are 50.” HA! I’m 56 and they are not, but whatever.

Riddle me this. No one convinced men that they should were a jock strap 24/7 or their twins would be down at their knees. Or maybe they believed, but didn’t care. A more likely story.

7 responses

  1. Where did you find my picture of my barb wire bra?????

  2. I wear Oroton and I find them perfectly comfortable. I can’t really go without – I’m a 34E – it is actually uncomfortable not to wear one. So you ladies with A or AA – consider yourselves lucky. Plus in my case because I am a 34, we are not supposed to have boobs, so shirts that fit everywhere else don’t button up properly. 🙁

    1. Marilyn Monroe had boobs at 34! Why can’t you? I think it is because clothing manufacturers are taking the cheap and easy road. It’s much cheaper to sew a square and slap some sleeves on it that it is to make a garment that actually fits the female physique.

  3. As you know I recently went to Malaysia and Indonesia, both Muslim countries, Indonesia being the largest Muslim country in the world. Before I went I received a few of the usual ignorant comments about how repressed the women were and how they are forced to wear scarves or veils. And even if they say it’s their choice to do it – it’s not really – they have to wear them or be ridiculed or disciplined or worse…
    I was in northern Sumatra, Aceh, which if you read the mainstream, is quite strict. Reality is there were shops selling beer openly at the side of the road. I ran into Muslim teenage girls smoking in the ladies room, running their own businesses, driving motorcycles wildly down the road, scarves, veils, full nun regalia flapping… I could make a list, but that’s not the point – other than they were all wearing some kind of head covering. It’s what they do there…
    My point is – we western women HAVE to wear a bra when we leave the house. Could you even imagine not wearing one to work? The looks, the stares, the little talk with someone from HR re appropriate dress in the workplace? (A friend of mine in Detroit got a dressing down and verbal warning for not wearing panty hose to work on a hot summer day!)
    I’ve never NEEDed a bra. I was a 34AA until I was 30 when I went to a 36A. I am still an A cup at 55. The only reason to wear a bra when I was young was to stuff tissue or socks into it so it looked like I had boobs. That was pre-underwire…
    Now – I couldn’t agree with you more – a bra is nothing but a torture device that serves no purpose other than to position and shove natural breasts into an unnatural and vaguely painful position. And we HAVE to wear them.
    Somehow, social pressure, fashion, office standards are all acceptable reasons for millions of women to spend their days in mild to extreme discomfort – and that’s okay. But a Muslim woman wraps a gorgous silk scarf over her head and she’s repressed…
    BTW – I’m with Pat Bean – since my departure from the corporate world and newly employed by my own self, all bosses and staff are going braless at this company… I’m gonna start a trend. Right now all of me is following it…

    1. OK, I’m with you! Convinced. To hell with bras and pantyhose. Well I quit wearing pantyhose the last time I almost threw my back out trying to wrestle them into position. Maybe I’ll picket the lingerie department at the local department store. And the prices??? A man would laugh in your face if you tried to charge him $40-$60 for some tighty whities.

  4. I’ve been going bra-less ever since I retired in 2004. Something has to be pretty important for me to wear one even for a few hours. A nice little vest over a T-shirt is quite adequate for most all occasions.

    1. A vest over a T-shirt? I like it!

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