Never Believe Everything You Think

Alice and the Red Queen

Alice and the Red Queen

“Alice laughed: “There’s no use trying,” she said; “one can’t believe impossible things.”

“I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was younger, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”  Alice in Wonderland.

Never believe everything you think. It’s fine to have a healthy dose of self-esteem. Be sure in your convictions and all that good stuff. But wait a minute. Slam on the brakes and back up. Was that a big neon conviction sign you just drove past.

I firmly believe I am innocent!

I firmly believe I am innocent!

Let’s dissect the culprit. Con-vic-tion: –noun: 1. a fixed or firm belief. 2. the act of convicting. 3. the state of being convicted. Origin: 1400–50; late Middle English < Late Latin convictiōn- (stem of convictiō ) proof (of guilt) – or – meaning “mental state of being convinced” is from 1690s; that of “firm belief, a belief held as proven” is from 1841. Pffft. There are still people who believe the earth is flat.

Look it up on-line and what is the first Google ad that pops up? Criminal Record Removal – Expunge your criminal record today! We offer a free online assessment.

Where am I going with this? Walking by the TV last night I heard a scientist talking about the universe. For years now they’ve been saying that the universe is expanding and slowing down in the process. Now they cheerfully announce “It’s speeding up.”

WHAT? Hold everything. The universe is getting bigger AND speeding up? That explains a lot. Why my bathtub fills up faster when I’m not in the room. Or the fact that as soon as I turn my head for 5 seconds all my plants die of dehydration. Everything is happening faster.

Huge Discussion

Huge Discussion

This going faster theory turns everything on its head. The big bang shot the universe out of a celestial canon and it’s not slowing down like things shot out of canons should do? All those scientific “laws” are suddenly invalid. Why was this not on the front page of every newspaper on the planet? Why were there no congressional hearings? A Papal synod? At the very least a brief mention on Twitter. Maybe there was, but it skipped right by.

Maybe, just maybe,  there is the remote possibility that a few of my beliefs, so deeply ingrained that I don’t even realize I have them, are the opposite of true, as in untrue/wrong? Gasp! Maybe coffee beans don’t belong in the freezer. Maybe there are multiple ways to view any given concept. Maybe these multiple views are not so simple as right/wrong but just different.

Or maybe the moon really is made of cheese. What do I know?

What do you think?

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