Yellow Journalism Chaps My Grits

Yellow Journalism

Children don’t need to sex education. They will figure that out soon enough. What they do need to learn is skills they need in everyday life – how to balance a checkbook, build a fire, change a tire.  Attributed to Loretta Lynn

I’m adding to that list. A journalism class should be a requirement for every living child that prides themselves on making it alive through high school. The news and journalism are a business – meaning for profit! I’m not criticizing free enterprise and I glory in the life style I am able to live because of it. BUT, what I am saying is that it is a mistake to take as gospel truth anything you are spoon fed to keep you freaked out and tuned in, logged on or what-eh-ver.

Today Will be the Worst Day of your life

Case in point. Mr. Husband, an otherwise highly intelligent man, believes everything, and I do mean everything, he hears on Fox (righty tighty, Gawd ‘n Country, but only our way) news. On the other hand my highly intelligent mother believes everything she reads on smirkingchimp.com, a mish mosh of way far left, conspiracy theory, if you’re Republican, you are delusional, type of news.

If  Mumsy went any farther left she’d come full circle and be on the right. If her and the hub-man ran into each other on their way around the far left/far right circlet of hysteria it would cause an explosion on the order of matter/anti-matter coming together The universe as we know it would come to spectacular end.

Anyone watching from another universe on a telescope would laugh and ask “What is wrong with these people? Don’t they know that the Great Pumpkin is the source of all that is true and good?”

One of the most interesting projects I had in journalism class was to take some bit if innocuous news and compare the description of the event from 2 different news sources. I chose Ford falling down the steps of Air force One and 2 Boston papers. I wish I had kept the essay. So I’m making this up as an example. Paper 1; he didn’t actually fall, he bent over to tie his shoelace. Paper 2; he didn’t fall he was given something to make him dizzy and pushed down the stairs by the opposing party in a desperate grab for power.

People tend to slant the “news” about themselves in exactly the same way. Come on, you know you do. What to listen for is a convoluted answer to a straight question. I going to use Mr. Husband as my research example. He’s handy and radical so he makes an excellent test subject.

Wifey: What Color is the sky?

Hub-man: Well yesterday, I went to the store and noticed in transit that is was sort of blue-gray, mixed with streaks of purple probably caused by those damned Democrats doing some kind of protest.

Wifey: Again, what color is the sky, now, this moment?

Hub-man: Well according to satellite imagery it will be dark and we might get hail, do you want to put your car in the garage?

Wifey (through gritted teeth): what-color-is-the-sky? Bend your neck, look up.

Hub-man (looks up): Parts of it are a bluish color, but can we really see the sky for all the liberals trying to change it? Maybe the word blue isn’t politically correct anymore?

Wifey: I give up.

Note to Mr. Husband: This is what happens to my brain when I am subjected to news programs before coffee.

5 responses

  1. A million thank yous from a member of the evil, liberal media! We would LOOOOOVE for everyone to be at least a little educated… then we could stop writing to a third-grade level (seriously, they tell us to do that).

    1. It’s down to 3rd grade level? Oh God,last I heard it was 6th grade. That’s scary

    2. Mr. Husband is always in a lather about the liberal media. I always respond “OK so where the hell is this liberal media, cuz I want to watch it, read it, or listen to it. In 7 years he hasn’t given me a straight answer, which confirms my suspicion that he’s just parroting something he heard Limbaugh or someone on Fox say. He claims Fox news is “fair and balanced” so I tuned in to listen one day. The first thing they said was something about “those bottom feeding liberals.” Yeah fair and balanced. Riiiigggghhht.

  2. Clear thinking is a standard part of our achool curriculum and I was stunned when speaking to a USA teacher to learn it is NOT part of the USA curriculum until university – WAY too late by then.

    We are basically taught never to believe anytyhing in the media unless it can be substantiated by confirming reports from other sources and even then to remain sceptical.

    As for the sky? Covered in cloud today and that is nothing to do with politics!

    1. I’m beginning to wonder if clear thinking is sort of frowned on here as vaguely liberal and un-Godly. The fundamentalist minded of our country have added an eleventh commandment. “Thou shalt not think for thyself or haveth common sense.” Futhermore, though shalt believeth anything I sayeth as long as I proclaimeth myself pr0-life. (gag me with a chainsaw)

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