Letter to My Sister

This diatribe started out as an email reply to my sister’s previous communique to me and ended up being a blog post. It started out with stuff that’s between me and sister, and ain’t nobody’s business but ours. But it turned into a rant and rants are one of my specialties. My other specialties are strawberry shortcake and long-winded short stories.

Dear Sis,

I received an email from a friend who expressed concern after reading my blog and went on to say that I sounded depressed and angry. My first thought was “oh, so now you’re going to fricking psychoanalyze me through my blog????” It really blew the lid off the pot and got me going. If one could somehow harness anger as a power source, North Texas would have a free month of electricity thanks to me.

After a long session of stewing and muttering it came to me. He’s right and Hell ya, I’m depressed and angry. So much in fact that I feel stripped naked and standing on a hill-top in all my furious glory with flames shooting out of my head.Actually the depression stems from frustration due to the inability to adequately express as much anger as I have at the moment without committing some act that would get me on the news. Dealing with Hubman’s mother is becoming an ongoing night mare. I feel like I died and went to Mother in Law hell.

I’m also boiling mad at the medical profession. Her doctor informed her that HE preferred to treat teeny-weeny pre-cancerous lumps conservatively and follow-up surgery with a round of radiation therapy. It should be against the law to call anything as violent as blasting someone with Xrays therapy. This means zapping her chest with radiation 5 days a week for 6 weeks. He did not even bother to tell her options and ask her what her preference was. To me it sounds like he’s treating her breast as if it was some kind of recalcitrant growth not attached to her body. And so now he’s gonna just blast the living shit out of it. Back to the stone age or further back if possible. Can’t have any slip ups on HIS statistics, no sireeee.

So again, Hell yes, I’m angry. I’m pissed at the way doctors think they are God just because they took a few years of Human mechanics classes and I’m pissed at the people who go along with this delusion.  So yea, in case I haven’t clearly spelled it out I’M ANGRY. A raging, boiling hot lava, old wet hen, white-hot, nuclear explosion, fire first and ask questions later type of angry. PS: I’m also angry at God.

Other than that everything is fine 🙂 And thank you for listening.

6 responses

  1. Ohhhhhhhhh. So little to say (so rare of me I know…) I have always hated that the words associated with cancerous lumps are ‘war’ words. We Burn (radiation) Cut (surgery) and Poison (chemo) and I’m just sorry that this is going on – it more than sucks. In all that, I believe that your vivid expressions with humor and honesty are a gift to many of the rest of us.

    1. Humor and honesty are my way of coping with life. I’ve never been able to understand why people use euphemisms as if pretending something is not what it is makes it better. Don’t even get me started about war words. If I get going about that my husband will have to call the fire department to get me down from the roof. I’ll be up there with a megaphone screaming about the over use of the word war.

  2. Did it go well? Hope so!! if you need help to smash something, give me a call!! I too hate those Doctors that believe they are God … I understand the feeling.
    A big hug my dear!!!

    1. Thank you, I think Hugs are a miracle drug. No matter what is going on a hug always feels good.

  3. Until now,and only because you said so,you never sounded angry or depressed to me.It’s obvious you really care a lot about your Mother in Law,you your love Hub Man,and are rightfully concerned about them at this scary,difficult time…While true friends will care and should be concerned if they think someone sounds down and unlike their usual self,they should talk in person or at least by phone.One can better gauge the true state of one’s friend that way because of the tone in their voice.E-mail and even letters seem slightly passive aggressive because declaring how depressed and angry they think you are,immediately puts the other on the defense.Now you’re expected to explain and defend yourself.(Though perhaps he thought you might not take his call,and that’s why he emailed.)It’s a real shame he used your own blog against you and sorta sent you into a tailspin.Sheesh… I hope you realize one of your many secret super powers is your ability to see the humor in ANY situation while being brutally honest and objective about yourself (and others) and then writing about it! I have gotten so much joy and laughter out of your candid and hilarious posts,and I know I’m not the only one.May I recommend two back to back chick flicks with some Chinese food followed by a nice Tanqeray in your p.j.’s?Call me in the morning.

    1. Thank you! Now we’re talking! I may watch 3 flicks with 3 Gin and Tonics. But, since I’m going to stay with Mom in Law tonight (she had the surgery today) I may need to keep the self soothing activities under wraps just a tad. She might not see the humor if I get tipsy and start smashing her her crystal cocktails glasses in the fire place. Then again, she might join me 🙂

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