Oh, the Meds They Are a Changin’

Should I Get Out of Bed Today?

Should I Get Out of Bed Today?

I think that somewhere along the way Big Pharma has figured out a way to get the entire population of planet earth on one pill or other.

Have you listened to any pharmaceutical advertisements lately? You are told to ask your Doctor if Dopazopazine is right for you. (I made up the name) In the commercial there is no mention of what the medicine is for. Why bother with that pesky detail? We should all be on something right? Anyone living in a 1st world nation should be on some kind of medicine. Get with the program and make it snappy! Everyone stand back, take a deep breath, pop a chicklet and no one will get hurt.

And the side effects…may cause; nausea, heartburn, hair loss, hair growth in all the wrong places, bone density loss, rash, breasts on men, back pain, dizziness, shortness of breath, hallucinations, swelling of extremities (and not the good kind of swelling), seepage, exploding scrotum, or sudden death. Say what? If I take a certain med, does this mean I should put my affairs in order because I might just suddenly croak one fine day, mid sentence,  and land with a thud with my face in a plate of spaghetti? How undignified! And it’s definitely a way to ruin an otherwise perfectly lovely evening.

It would be problematic especially in the shoe department because I have small feet and no one I know could wear my shoes should I choose to bequeath them to a friend or relative. I guess they would just have to fend for themselves, lost and alone on a shoe rack in a dark corner at the Salvation Army. How sad.

Just One More Wafer Thin Mint

Just One More Wafer Thin Mint

However, if you really need to be on medication, they can be a God send. My psych doc has me on a low dose of Seroquel. It’s been a miracle drug so far. I wake up in the morning, after getting a good night’s sleep, feeling happy and calm. Much better than waking up after a scant 2 or 3 hours of restless sleep and on the lookout for something to get ticked off about. Skulking around fighting off toxic thoughts like “if you make that weird sound in your throat one… more… time, I’m going to beat you over the head with a tea kettle!” is not a good way to struggle through the day. It’s exhausting.

The main side effects of this particular med are increased appetite and weight gain. Ha! Increased appetite, my ass. If you find yourself staring at your leather sofa thinking “hmm, I bet that would taste fantastic if I slapped it in a giant hot dog bun and added a little mustard”…this is waaaay beyond an increased appetite.  It’s more like a ravenous, starving, howling dog kind of compulsion.

But they tell me that this will go away as my body adjusts to the meds. I hope so, because I really like the sofa and I would hate to ruin it with teeth marks. And I really, really, really don’t want to have to buy a new wardrobe of pants in a larger size.

7 responses

  1. Thankfully (I think) the advertising os prescription drugs is not allowed here. I hope it never is. I’ve seen the USA ads and they are inappropriate.

    I notice there is a movement to stop it. Kirsty Alley is one leading the campaign.

    I am one who puts on weight with any medication so I try to avoid them all!

    1. I didn’t know Kirtsty Alley was leading a campaign to ban advertising meds? Seems rather odd seeing as she is the poster child for starring in ads for every weight loss system known to man. 🙂

      However,I’m against the government sticking their nose anything in general. So I’m not really OK with banning much of anything. We didn’t learn from prohibition it. Every time Big Brother bans something it makes everyone want it even if they didn’t bother with before.

      1. I guess we have different perspectives of government’s role. I see we vote them in to do OUR bidding. If they don’t we vote them out. We see prescription meds advertising as terrible. The publuc aren’t doctors!

        Weight loss stuff is not prescription, so I don’t have a problem with that, although I don’t think they work, given the research! 🙂

  2. I’m finally on meds that don’t increase my appetite and I’ve managed to lose all the weight I gained on the previous meds. Yay! I’m just hoping the “cocktail” of meds I’m currently on continues to work and I don’t have to go through the agony of changing meds. So far, all my doctor has had to do is add some meds for anxiety and some nutritional supplements for the anxiety and these seem to be working. The depression meds (one older med and one newer) seem to work well for me, with a “booster” that helps me sleep, too. It’s taken a long time to get to this place. May it work for a long time.

    1. I have my fingers crossed for you Doll. If you have found a cocktail that works for you then that is sufficient cause for a week long celebration, in my opinion. May you live long, have your meds keep working and prosper!! 🙂

  3. oh my!! you made me laugh with your way of talking about meds!!! because I totally agree with you, the list of side effects is soooo bad that sometimes I wonder if I`m not suicidal when I have to swallow a pill !!! I hope you don`t eat your sofa, it`d be a pity to lose such a comfortable companion!! xoxo

    1. Had a talk with my sofa and she agrees with you!

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