Category Archives: Miscelleneous Adventures

I’m Loosin’ it Man

While this whole pandemic thing has been scary, morbidly interesting, heart breaking, stress inducing, terrifying, thought provoking, etc…It’s also getting boring. I know, I know…it seems shallow to complain, but what the hell, I’m going to do it anyway.

Before you throw your laptop, iPad, phone or whatever at me just listen.. Yes I’m aware that there people dying. Yes, I am aware that there are people suffering horribly, barely managing, or even failing to put food on their family table. People loosing jobs and getting evicted from their home or apartment. People have lost family members, women giving birth in isolation because they can’t have anyone with them.

Then there is the opposite situation about famous, rich people whining away on Instagram while in their enormous mansion, with a pool, tennis courts, helicopter pad, riding stable, paint ball, arena, water park, blah blah.. I have a weird and rather controversial take on this. They are people too and yeah, they aren’t at the bottom of the human heap of suffering, but they are still capable of compassion. And anyone can start to feel cooped up regardless of the size of their cage. A cage is a cage.

I came about this weird way of looking at things when I was talking to my Mother a while back. To those of you who follow my blog, (and thank you if you do) My Mom lost 2 daughters a couple of years ago. Less than 6 months apart. She went from a mother of 6 to 4 living. I went from having 3 sisters down to 1. This tragedy was an enormous shock to the whole family.

Needless to say she has been having a really hard time. She told me that she was still having difficulties, 2 years later. Then she started beating herself up for suffering. “I shouldn’t feel this way. There are plenty of people in the world who are way worse off them me. I should be happy for what I DO have.” And so on and so forth. I got frustrated and told her “Hey, your grieving is valid and real to you, and you have a right to go through process!!” Sure practicing gratitude is a good thing. But, a loss is a loss.

I feel like this whole “who is suffering the most” bit has turned into a social media circus of finger pointing and generalized hateful criticism. This situation is weird and stressful for everyone. So if no one is allowed to complain, become outraged, blurt out inappropriate things in the heat of the moment, demand changes, etc. because there is someone, somewhere, suffering more??? Taken to it’s ridiculous over blown conclusion — NONE of us are allowed complain unless we are maybe a leprous beggar living in a slum, eating garbage from trash heaps.

I think we need to turn away from barking at each other and look at the big picture. A teeny tiny little virus has almost brought the world to it’s knees. I don’t think we are there yet. Maybe staggering around a bit. There is a learning experience here. The entire collective “we” governments and citizens alike, were woefully unprepared.

When I was still a working woman I had the good fortune to be sent to a workshop to learn about creating a disaster plan. My place of work chose to call it a “Business Continuity Plan.” We talked about various scenarios, tornado, power outage, aggressive flu, terrorist taking over our building. Just all kinds of interesting things. We talked about phone trees so everyone could connect and know what the plan of action was, working from home, having paper copies of our plan in everyone’s possession in case there was no phone or internet, even switching to off shore server farms if things got really bad. The one thing we didn’t cover was a planet wide disaster.

All it takes is a quick visit to the CDC or FEMA websites to be instructed that everyone should be prepared enough to shelter in place for at least a week. Who does that? We’re all reliant on being able to get whatever we need or want at any time, if we can afford it.

I’m one of those weirdos who actually did have a plan in place. I’m addicted to dystopian fiction. All kinds of shit hits the fan scenarios. Did I have N95 masks? Why yes I did, but not enough to last this long. I have boxes of rubber gloves, but I can’t find them. I proudly possess 1 key chain sized hand sanitizer which buried in the bottom of a purse or carry on, who knows where. I do however have enough food squirreled away to last at least 6 months. I have enough water to last about 1 month, assuming no showering.

Who am I to be saying what I’m saying? Just me. I can probably plop myself down in an American middle class in terms of economic status at the moment. I do know what it’s like to be dirt poor. Try looking for bottles on the side of the road to cash in for the deposit to buy food. Yeah, I been there as a child.

The point I’m making is that I think we should all channel our outrage and fear into working together and become activists to be far better prepared for the next meltdown. And there will be one. This pandemic has been a huge wake up call for everyone, regardless of their economic status or state of health. It’s been pretty amazing that in the U.S., most of us still have the 1st world basics: electricity, internet, phone, gas stations, running water, pharmacies and so on. It could be worse, yeah, but it’s still totally unpleasant.

So that is my rant for today. Decided to try writing today, because yesterday I spent far to much time on YouTube, watching videos about how to carve a hot air balloon on a river stone, to how to make flowers out of old toilet tissue rolls. I’m even sick of playing the Sims. Enough said.

UPDATE – I’m Not a Plague Carrier!


So just an update if you’re interested. I got the results of the Flu and Covid test. As of today I tested negative for both. Thank you, Lord! And pass the biscuits.

The Covid test does not show if I had the virus when I was so deathly ill 5 weeks ago. There is a test coming out that looks for Covid antibodies in the blood. I will definitely take that test as soon as it is available.

I’m kind of a quandary though. Since I don’t know if I had it…I could still be vulnerable to contracting it. Yeesh. But it’s good to know that I am virus free at the moment. It was kind of creepy and weird feeling like a plague carrier.

I know logically that it wasn’t my fault. I didn’t go to the airport and lick any doorknobs or french kiss someone who just got finished coughing up a lung. But still, I was terrified that my husband was going to get sick. He hasn’t yet. He’s exhausted and freaked out that his wife was so sick. But otherwise OK.

Well that’s it for now, dear readers. Thanks for listening. Talk to you soon.

Social Distancing VS a Mariachi Band

Mariachi BandHuman beings never cease to amaze me. We are the most fascinating creatures on earth. Since I’ve been so deathly sick I haven’t really had an issue with social distancing. It’s not really on the radar while I’m just trying not to pee my pants from coughing so hard.

So anyway, about a week ago, I staggered out to mailbox as my way of getting some fresh air and exercise and what do my wondering eyes behold? About 4 houses down they were throwing a huge party with a Mariachi band….in the front yard no less. I couldn’t believe my eyes. In this neighborhood nobody does anything in their front yard but check mail and grab the newspaper. All parties go on either in the house or the backyard. This is an old suburban housing track with huge back yards.

This was a major statement on their part. “Screw you world and screw social distancing. We’re having a party! Neener Neener! I struggled with whether or not to call the police, but ultimately didn’t. I have a hard time doing that unless there is a murder, assault, or theft going on.

Now that I think about, I wish I had. There could be a death as a result of this blatant disregard for exposing themselves or someone else to the Covid virus. At the very least its an inhumane and callous disregard for the welfare of others.  Yesterday my son informed me that one of his friends lost his wife to the virus. Yep, she straight up died. That’s just mind blowing and tragic.

I just don’t understand how some people can think that it’s OK to put someone’s life at risks just because you don’t feel like staying home. It kind of reminds me of the early days of AIDS when people would have unprotected sex knowing they were HIV positive. At least with aids you could pretty much avoid it by not have unprotected sex and avoiding blood products if at all possible.

With this Covid-19 Virus? Well it’s kind of difficult to not breath. And that’s pretty much the only way to avoid exposure if you are around other people.

I finally got tested yesterday for Covid. My doctor ordered it. It was a rather interesting experience and quite well organized. I was impressed. I was instructed to go to a particular hospital and park in an area cordoned off by traffic cones and call a phone number when I got there. A few minutes later an actual Doctor and Nurse came out dressed in full hazmat gear came out to my car.

I got a full medical workup in my car. The Doctor checked my blood oxygen, listened to my lungs, poked around on my abdomen and listened to my long tail of medical woe. Then he stuck a stick up my nose, both nostrils, all the way to my brain. Yea it hurt. Twice because they tested me for Covid and Flu. He went back inside for a few minutes and came back out to tell me that I was scheduled for a chest x-ray. I walked into the hospital got the x-ray and that was that. The whole process took a grand total of 30 minutes.

Just FYI, my x-ray was clear so I don’t have pneumonia. Yee Hah! That was a huge relief to me, the Hubman and everyone else I told.

I think I like getting a check up in my car. How convenient! I hope this ends up being part of the new normal.

Is the Desire for War a Form of Collective Mental Illness?

And it’s one, two, three,
What are we fighting for?
Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn,
Next stop is Vietnam;
And it’s five, six, seven,
Open up the pearly gates,
Well there ain’t no time to wonder why,
Whoopee! we’re all gonna die.
Lyrics – Country Joe and the Fish

I went to see that movie American Sniper last night. It was a rather sobering experience. But how much more sober can you get than stone cold? Who knows? If you haven’t heard about this movie it’s based on the biography of Chris Kyle, a sniper who did 4 tours in Iraq. He is known as the most lethal sniper in American History with 160 confirmed kills. He made it home alive and was murdered by a troubled veteran he was trying to help.

I’m not even going to go into the nasty debate about whether he was a hero or a coward. My opinion is that he was a soldier doing what he thought was the right thing to do to protect his family and country. He didn’t start the war – he just did what he had to do.

That being said, I’ve been pondering the whole war conundrum. I laid awake much of last night thinking about it. In a way we treat our returning warriors the same way we treat people with mental illness. We sweep it under the rug and pretend the problem doesn’t exist.

Those caught up in the war machine seem have the same mental kinks as people who are mentally ill and/or have mental illness or substance abuse problems. “Oh this is just affecting us, no one else has to deal with it, and we’re handling it just fine.” Hogwash!

As I look back over my life I can see that war has tainted my entire life. I was in my mid-teens when the Vietnam War was going on. I faced the fear that if it continued for a few more years that my brothers would have to go. I was the oldest in my family and female, but my girlfriends had older brothers that were sent off to Vietnam. They came home in a box. One of those brothers was the first boy I ever kissed. He kissed me the night before he went off to boot camp.

During that era teenage trouble making was a death sentence if you were boy from a blue collar family. The judge gave them a choice “jail or Vietnam.” Stupid boys chose Nam. I would have much rather they went to jail, but I was a 14 year old girl, my say didn’t matter much then. It probably doesn’t matter much more now. I just have a wider audience.

After my girlfriends lost their brothers, we three musketeers decided to wear black arm bands to school. We got in all kinds of trouble for it. Being teen aged innocents we didn’t know we were protesting, we just knew that our guys died and we were sad and very angry. We had to stay after school for detention every day that we wore those arm bands. Funny thing was no one ever tried to confiscate them. If this happened in the present they probably would have them confiscated. Can’t wear or carry anything to school that might offend someone nowadays. I don’t remember how long we wore them and when we stopped either. How odd. We drifted apart, life goes on I guess.

Fast forward to when I was 18 years old. I fell in love with a Vietnam vet who was one of those who made it home in body but not in mind. My mother hated him and knew he was trouble. She finally told me to not talk to her until I was finished with him. She was right in a way. He was trouble because he was troubled. When we walked down the street he was constantly scanning and looking around at trees, roof tops, alleyways. I thought he was just unusually alert. What did I know about soldiers and PTSD? My dead friends don’t talk about that. 6 months later he committed suicide by cop. Meaning they tried to arrest him, he said “you’re not taking me alive” and boom he’s dead.

So at the tender age of 14 I learned that I was not invincible. People die because of other people’s decisions, shit happens. Should children have to learn that? I don’t know but there are children all over the world in war zones learning this every day. Are we better for it? I don’t think so. But that’s just my opinion among billions of others.

Is There ANY Logical Reason to Throw Away an Empty Firearm?

Well, I know I’ve hit a rough patch when I go on a binge of reading Zombie Apocalypse novels to cheer up. After the death of a loved one there’s not much in there to scare you, and just like grieving – it goes on and on …and on. Zombies, here, there and everywhere.

Over the past week I’ve read about 15  zombie books on my Kindle. They are actually pretty funny. If you want to read about all the creative and almost hilarious ways people can screw up and be branded “too stupid to live” immediately before their inevitable demise, it’s all that and so much more. Sorry if I’m referring to death as funny, but come on. Check out the Darwin awards if you have questions. (The stupid ways that people actually, in real life, removed themselves from the gene pool.)

But back to my original question, is there any logical reason to throw away a firearm just because you’re out of ammo? If I’m out of food I don’t throw away my stove and refrigerator. I’m assuming that if you are on the run in an ongoing survival situation; war, extended riots, zombie or other kind of hair-raising apocalyptic situation, you would probably hope against hope to acquire more ammo at some point.

A recurring theme in all the books I’ve read so far is this. The hero, heroes, heroine, etc. is/are in yet another fight for their life and run out of ammo, then they THROW AWAY THEIR WEAPON (???), and run away screaming, look for a blunt object, get in an argument with their companions, or lay down and die. What the hell is that all about? Excuse me, but if I run out of ammo for my revolver or rifle, I’m still holding a blunt object that I can brain someone or something with and hopefully am able to reload in the future. Maybe I’m just a practical gal, but I wouldn’t throw down my weapon like it was an empty juice box.

I guess if you are armed with some kind of weird antique revolver that only takes handmade ammo or something similar there would be a reason to lighten your load. OK, maybe if you’re running for your life, shooting it out has become a moot point, have an extremely heavy rifle and there is very little chance that you will be coming back to it with or without ammo I could see dropping it. However, in these zombie novels someone throws away their firearm every chapter or two without fail.

I think part of it is that in a zombie novel you pretty much invent everything that happens. It is total fiction and one has artistic license to come up with whatever whacked out unbelievable scenario that suits your fancy. In prepper, survivalist type novels the authors usually are a little more experienced in the weapons department or at least do their homework.

Another thing that the characters in these zombie novels do over and over that annoys me to no end is they drive right through the middle of a seemingly abandoned town at high noon, put their car in park, leave the vehicle unattended with the keys in it, running, cross their fingers, and plunge into a dark abandoned store. Chaos ensues, of course. Does anything go right at the end of the world?

Well, that’s a whole ‘nother rant so I’m going to stop here for now.

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