Tag Archives: Brawls

Thrashed With a Guidebook

Renoir - Woman Reading

I love to read. Any occasion calls for it. If a civil war should suddenly spring up, I would be found off to the side somewhere hiding under a wagon, my nose in a book. I long ago decided to that I was a conscientious objector to country wide brawls. I’ve taken my thumps in the past at the amateur level. As the oldest of six I had to step in on occasion and defend my beloved siblings.

Now that they are grown…well that’s another story. Fortunately they are not the type to yell “for Valhalla” and dive head first into a fray. Except for my youngest brother, but he’s on his own now. I don’t even attempt to break up fisty cuffs between grown men. And I use the term grown loosely when it comes to bar brawls.

It’s so unpleasant and usually uncalled for. I don’t need my honor defended, thank you very much. Those who won’t back off with the receipt of a scathing look…well…I leave the vicinity immediately. OK, I must confess, I did whack a rude fellow over the head with a guide book I was reading once. In my defense he pulled my hair 3 times. Pretending inability to speak English the first 2 times I asked him to stop pulling my hair, and calling me a bitch the 3rd time. A lady can only take so much before she results to the deployment of primal defense maneuvers. And I didn’t have a pair of gloves handy to slap him with.

So I read 2 books this week. My sister told me about them. Both by Jerome K. Jerome. Three Men in a Boat and 3 Men on a Bummel. They are both hilarious, laugh out load funny. Both stories are about 3 friends traveling together. Jerome has an insight to people that is timeless. He wrote these books in the late 1800s and they are still completely relevant today. The same sense of adventure mixed with peevishness and occasional desire to say “to hell with this” and be transported in the blink of an eye to ones home and bed are the experience of any traveler.

The let down of arriving at an attraction after much fussing and hardship and finding it less than attractive has happened to just about anyone who ventures farther than the end of their home street. The same with the sudden sense of bliss and all is right with the world at the end of a long day of successful adventuring. A good meal and a drink or 2 make all the difference in the world. If this happens under a roof, in a building with running water, even better. We are now approaching Nirvana.

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