Our Cat Has Pneumonia
Yes, indeed our beloved feline has pneumonia. I didn’t even realize that could happen to cats. This poor kitty picked his parents well when he adopted us. He has been the most high maintenance cat I’ve ever had. My sneaking suspicion it is because he’s male. I never had these problems with female cats. Oh, just kidding…well no I’m not, actually. Human males can be a bit high maintenance as well, in my experience.
In retrospect, Mr. Kitty had been trying to tell us he’s not ok with bizarre behaviors; inappropriate urination – on the stove, my shoe, a pile of laundry, hacking up unmentionable ectoplasm all over the house, pawing at us and then running to hide. But when he started gasping for breath we finally figured out he was in crisis and rushed him to the vet.
So now we have a kitty with pneumonia and have to give him medicine twice a day and hope for the best. Giving a cat medicine is no easy task. Of course it doesn’t take him long to figure out our nefarious plan and hides. Then it falls to me to drag him yowling, hissing and scratching out of whatever his hidey hole du’ jour is. We wrap him up in a bath towel like a burrito, so he can’t claw us to shreds, and then give him a dropper full of antibiotic and an anti-congestion pill. He of course struggles, growls, tries to get loose from his towel straight jacket and in general acts like we are skinning him alive for sport.
Just like a child, Kitty doesn’t understand that all these horrible things we are doing to him are for his own good. It reminds me of a sister when she was a kid. She fought like a banshee every single time she needed to take meds. She never did figure out that it was inevitable. She absolutely would not take medicine without a fight. It took 5 of us to hold her down. One sibling to each arm and leg, and one kid to hold her nose long enough for her to open her mouth so my Mom could pop in the medication. It’s sort of ironic really, because she’s swung to the opposite extreme in her adulthood and will take anything she can get her hands on.
My Cat is Trying to Tell Me Something

evil cat via sodahead.com
My cat is trying to tell me something. Just wish I could figure out what the heck he’s trying to say. I know he thinks he’s had the last word, but this is getting ridiculous.
This morning I wandered into the kitchen in my typical just woken up peaceful state of mind and proceeded to start the coffee-making process. I had a few technical difficulties so I was in the kitchen longer than usual. I put the ground coffee in the place where the filter goes without putting the filter in first. Woopsie.
As I was putting things to rights to get the coffee going I noticed a weird stench. I sniffed the dish rag, nope. The garbage disposal passed the sniff test also. I checked under the sink, nothing going under there.
Then I noticed some sort of bizarre ectoplasm on the stove top. It looked like a pot had boiled over, but there were 2 things wrong with that theory. It was around the back right burner which neither I or Hubman ever use for some reason. Also the house keeper cleaned the living daylights out of the stove on Thursday. (She even puts the burner racks in the dishwasher, so I have to reassemble the stove the next day.) Furthermore we were out to dinner on Friday so no cooking happened.
Then I sniffed it and viola the source of the stench was revealed. I leaned in to check out the stove hood to see if something was dripping from up there. I half expected to see some alien pod attached to it. What can I say, I watch a lot of sci-fi?
Finally I daubed a paper towel in the substance and to get an up close olfactory diagnosis. The mystery became obvious. Our G* D@#m cat PEED ON THE STOVE!!!!!????!!!! I’ve heard of cats weeing in your luggage when you are packing for a trip, or on the bath mat, or even on the bed if they are really ticked off about something. But the stove, what the hell is up with that? How do I figure this one out? Does he want us to cook for him? Or was he mad because we went out to dinner? Bleh, who knows?
At first I wondered if the storms upset him, but the tornadoes happened on Wednesday night. The urinary infraction occurred sometime in the Friday night – early Saturday morning time frame.
Was this just mischief? Does he have a legitimate beef of some sort that he is trying to convey? I swear I briefly considered the possibility of finding him a new home. But, I love the little critter even though he is frequently a royal pain in rear.
I’m seriously stumped here. Maybe it’s time to hire a cat whisperer?
What To Do On a Snowy Day
Looking for something to do an a snowy day? Give the cat a bath.
Here in Texas snow is a rare and beautiful event. Bathing a cat is an even more rare. Also, washing the cat is an excellent exercise in two grown humans trying to collaborate on a task that many claim is not do-able. The fact the said humans are married, and wish to remain so, may grease the wheels a bit.
This undertaking did not come about because of a whimsical urge or boredom. It arose from the fact that kitty suffered from some sort of intestinal outrage during the night and evidently rolled around in it. He and his bed smelled beyond horrible. Being one of those cats that likes to greet you at the crack of dawn by sticking his butt in your face added to the necessity of immediate action.
Checked the internet first with varied results on advice. Some fell under the “well duh” category. Fill tub with water, place cat in tub. Really? Some articles offered advice about protective gloves and such. I have found that if your cat is fighting so hard that protective gear is needed, the battle is already lost. Give it up. Tomorrow is another day.
This is my method for bathing a cat, based on decades as a rather laissez-faire cat owner, and a little research on the internet:
- Instruct Husband to get camera.
- Put on old clothes that you can toss in wash afterwards.
- Fill tub about 6 inches deep with warm water, depending on size of cat. ( less for a tiny kitty obviously) Don’t ask me how I know this, just trust me, Mkay?
- Toss a bunch of old towels and a plastic cup for rinsing in the bathroom.
- By this time curious cat and husband should be in the bathroom investigating, so just close the door. Or fetch cat.
- Fold a couple of towels to kneel on and place them near where you are going to open shower door. (if you have enclosed tub/shower). Put another folded towel over the edge of the tub helps if you want to give your back a break and lean on it a bit.
- Pick up Kitty, who is now getting suspicious, and lower into tub of water, while speaking abundant kitty praise in a low and soothing tone.
- Be prepared to quickly switch to a proper scruff of the neck hold on the cat because this is the most likely point for them to try to bail. If you are not familiar with this hold, and do not know how to do so without injuring the cat or yourself, forget this whole process and take kitty to the vet. However, relying on outside assistance won’t help much in future filth and yucky poo emergencies such as feces or skunk spray, so I strongly advise you to learn this skill.
- Maintain scruff of the neck hold for a few minutes until cat calms down and recovers his or her dignity. Some cats seem to feel better if you let them stand in the tub on hind legs with front paws on the side of the tub.
- Instruct husband to take pictures and not aim the camera up your nostrils if at all possible.
- Have husband squirt kitty soap or baby shampoo in your hand, NOT on the cat. Very important! Some unsupervised husbands will squirt enough soap directly on kitty to degrease an 18 wheeler so take heed of this warning. Don’t make this any harder than it has to be by needing to rinse the cat 87 times.
- Bathe cat however it suits your fancy. However, if you are using flea shampoo start at the neck so fleas are prevented from evacuating to the cat’s head. This is a sight I promise you don’t want to see. (Ignore husband’s advice at this point. If he thought he could do it better, he should have plunked his happy behind down here on the floor and bloody well did it himself. His job is to photograph the evidence.)
- Rinse cat well. (duh) Hopefully by now kitty is resigned to it’s fate and will go down to all fours long enough for you to rinse the belly easily.
- Have husband hand you a towel. This step is optional and it’s usually easier to allow kitty to exit the tub in whatever manner it chooses.
- Dry kitty, who is probably cowering under the vanity, with towels as much as possible.
- Use blow dryer on low setting. If kitty has not experienced this before, it helps to let it run for a minute or 2 before you aim it at the cat to allow him to get used to the sound. Start blow drying cat, ruffling his fur, while holding dryer at a safe distance. A safe distance is defined as; if it’s too hot for your hand it’s too hot for the cat. Also, If he’s cowering in the corner it may be easier to let him stay there instead of trying force him to your arms, counter etc. After a few minutes kitty will realize the he is cold and the warm hair dryer feels pretty darn good. You may notice that his ears, that were back, relax so he will willingly submit to this further indignity.
- When you decide kitty is dry enough or your hips give out from sitting on the cold bathroom floor, open door and allow husband and kitty to stalk out of the bathroom.
Now, wasn’t that easy?