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Premature Ridiculation

EEK! They were right all along

I just hate Premature Ridiculation. I made that up. But it’s happened to you, I’ll bet cash money on that. You start to tell someone about an idea or dream of something you want to try and BAM! There it is.

Before you manage to get the complete thought out of your mouth, the Premature Rediculation factor kicks in. You are ridiculed by “well meaning” friends or family. “That’s a crazy idea. That place is dangerous, haven’t you listened to the news lately? (no) That will never work. Someone already tried that and failed.” So? The Wright Brothers didn’t fly the first time they tried either. And even lived to tell about it, so there!

There are drugs now for ailments we didn’t even know we had. Advertisements on TV instruct you to ask you doctor if Wombatizine is right for you. No hint of what it is for, just ask your Doctor. I have absolutely no interest in any new drug unless it increases my bust size and makes me giggle a lot, with side effects such as astral projection, sprouting wings, and unbreakable bones.

Gave some thought to what form of delivery system a drug to combat Premature Rediculation should take. I don’t think I want to take it daily as a preventive measure. If I took all the preventive meds that doctors want me to take combined in one pill it would be the size of the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex. How weird is that? To live in a Metroplex? Sounds very SciFi-ish.

Perhaps an aerosol spray like mace or shark repellent spray. One little puff into the squinched up face of a PR victim and their face relaxes. They say things like “wow, that sounds interesting” or “have fun” and mean it. The lingering effect could be repeated bouts of imagination and thinking outside the box. A cumulative effect would be nice, also. Over time they start coming up with their own plans and ideas and tell you about them. Maybe even invite you to participate.

I will invent it and call it RedicuzineXL© The XL stands for extended release. I know more than a few people who have this unmentionable and embarrassing condition. Maybe I could throw a party and slip it in the Margaritas. Yes!

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